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Next: Trip to Trinidad.

I’ve decided to travel to Trinidad with a coworker as a gift to myself and an added bonus to the independence development I’m currently going through. Although I’m not by myself 100%, the trip to another country without my family to rely on is a huge deal alone. Finding a detachment from my family is something I’ve never been able to do because I didn’t go away for college like a lot of people would (hell I still live with my mom now…something I’m not ashamed of), hence my newborn independence at twenty-two. Right now, I am finding myself okay with the thought of being physically separate from time to time more comforting than before. I am very glad I waited to begin taking lonesome trips, I am realizing that some things are meant to happen at the right time, and I think for me, my 20’s journey is all about self-development and traveling when possible.

Going to Trinidad was never a place I thought about traveling, It never crossed my radar in places I’d like to go to, it randomly just happened because my friend, who is also my coworker, spoke to me about traveling. She had already been to Trinidad before, and since we began working together and spending five hours to our entire shifts together, we began talking and spilling each-other secrets. As we became more acquainted, and realized we can actually become friends, I decided to ask her if I can join her on her trip to Trinidad when she mentioned she wanted to visit again and…. she agreed!

We booked the flight a couple of weeks after our conversation, which was about three months prior to the actual flight date. For starters, I have never thought about spending a certain amount of money in vacation; my entire life and most of all of my spending has only been acting, really. So when I had the money ready to purchase the flight-tickets and chose to finally purchase, those seconds before clicking the “purchase” button were exhilarating! I was so incredibly excited and anxious! and my heart was stuck in my throat! Gosh! you know that feeling you get when you’re about to go down from a roller-coaster that just went up over a gazillion feet high? and you’re like, “holy cow! Here. We. GO!” ….. that’s literally how I felt!!!!! ahhh!!!! It was so cool man!

One of the first challenges I encountered in traveling alone for the first time was packing. It was a challenge because I had no idea how to pack luggage without my mom’s help. First, I went about it all alone, as someone who’s used to doing things on her own, I thought I would be able to manage the experience wonderfully; wrong. I had to pack and unpack four times, by the last one, I had my mother’s guidance on my back. I spoke to her about my issue with the luggage, how much I loved it because it was so girly and small and modern and pretty, but looks can be extremely deceiving I’ve realized. Inside is small…EXTREMELY SMALL. On the first try, it didn’t close, I rolled all of my clothing, just like I read online, as rolling was the most beneficial way for more room for packing, but that didn’t work; the luggage just wouldn’t close, even if I sat on top of it! The second time, I reduced the amount of clothing I was bringing with me, I realized I was bringing way too much for five days, I wasn’t planning my outfits, I was just throwing clothes for no particular reason, I just chose clothes, “just in case.” which was wrong, again.

I became very frustrated when my clothing still didn’t fit in the luggage, I had come to realize that my luggage was just WAY too small. My grandmother and my mom suggested I not only changed luggage but also to 1. pre-select daily and nightly clothing, with specific shoes for each outfit, and 2. to fold them TOGETHER, not roll and pile each side by side, but to properly fold each on top of one another, with shoes on the top; holy cow it turns out it actually worked… in a new luggage that is…. but I still wasn’t fully satisfied.

I decided to switch luggage (to the small one) with the same routine and wow! it worked! I was a happy camper!

I also brought my book-bag with me and inside I packed:

  1. My Camera
  2. Make-up bag
  3. Toiletry bag
    • With Toothbrush
    • Toothpaste
    • mouthwash
    • lady things
  4. A hat
  5. perfume
  6. boarding pass
  7. and passport wallet
  8. a good mystery book
  9. headphones and charger
  10. water shoes for the beach

I’ve also packed travel sized lotion, body oil, deodorant, shampoo and conditioner, and brought my eczema lotion with me since my skin always reacts insanely when I travel to tropical places (&  Yes, I do suffer from eczema) and the most important product of all: sun screen!

I search about all the tips for the best traveling experience and I’ve felt ready for a month! but still, as I am hours away from leaving, I am still worried I’d missed something.

On the day of departure, I was anxious all day long, I scheduled my flight to leave at  midnight, and I was all ready to go, my luggage and book bag was packed, my clothes were ready, I communicated with my manager about my availability, so I wouldn’t be able to audition for a week (my heart is bleeding at this thought) my job was set, I was literally ready two nights prior to my departure, so on the day of, the thought of leaving just got me extremely anxious all day, I couldn’t distract myself with anything because I had nothing to do!

Funny Thought: this little anxiety, is the usual feeling I get prior to walking into an audition, which is no big-deal, I can totally handle it, it’s absolutely nothing compared to the anxiety feeling I get when I think about focusing in acting 100%, it’s like the thought of my future scares me to death.

I wonder why is it so different? both are the same feeling of the name anxiety, why is one more intense than the other? and why can’t I handle the more intense one like I can the one that’s less intense? so many question.

I was able to check-in online and assign myself my preferred seat, which was awesome! I love pre-planning everything, and I was waiting to get myself a window seat since I booked the flight! (although I wasn’t able to book until 24-hours before the flight…such torture!!!) I’ve also downloaded many movies from Netflix to prepare myself if I don’t sleep, and am bringing with me a neck pillow for sleep! I’m so excited!

I will be taking a lot of pictures in my trip and talk about my experience once I return

xx,

S.

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