I am very sensitive.
I can cry very easily, people affect me, things affect me. I get touched very easily and I can feel other people’s situation like they are my own, I am very empathetic. I love this part of me, I am vulnerable and I care about everything. Before, I hated this; I didn’t want to cry, I thought it was weak, that I was weak and I had the feeling like I didn’t deserve anything because I was so “weak”; but I have decided to own this part of me and make my sensitivity one of my best features; I have become a more proud human being and I’ve become more open, I’ve let people affect me in public and I’m not ashamed about it anymore, I think I’ve become more liberated because of it.
I realized everyone has their own personal preference and their own personal agenda’s. from experience, if you’re not how their definition of what a friend should be, or are like the people they’re surrounded by, you’re most likely going to get judged for not being how they see things. Each and everyone of us live in our own little bubble and view the world differently. I’ve met people who see the world as good, and others who see the world as evil, what’s most important though, is how you see your world and people for your own benefit and to be mindful that not everyone will see it the way you do, and totally accept that, specially if you want someone in your life.
My life would be in pieces if I followed everyone else’s judgement over my own, my life actually felt like it was a mess because of this. Not only was I be lying to myself, but I would become extra worried about my behavior around the precense of someone else; someone who might even have absolutely no effect whatsoever in the privacy of my own home. Not only that, but if (and that’s IF) I began behaving how this person wanted me to be: someone else might judge that as well and would find something else to judge. It would just become an endless cycle of keeping everyone else happy, considering someone else’s emotion instead of my own.
This is just a road to unhappiness valley, and I’m not willing to go there.
So I’m slowly learning to not worry about someone else’s judgement other than mine own, because I matter, because my opinion matters, and because my own happiness is more important than making someone else happy. creating the life I want is my control, and if people disagree with how I see the world, and force me to be something I am not, well, then guess what? this person ins’t meant to be part of my life and/or experience my journey in this world.
Honey, we need to be selfish when it comes to making ourselves happy, people are going to hate it, people are going to STRONGLY dislike you, and even judge you for not fitting into how they see the world; but when you do what makes you happy and forget about everyone else, and you come home at the end of the day, without their presence in your room; who is going to be happy? you, because you’re standing up for yourself.
Everyone is so quick to tell everyone else what to do but aren’t willing to look at themselves and judge their own life, they become ignorant’s to other’s experiences and close themselves off to their own view; begin by judging yours instead of letting someone else become the driver of your life; that will only make you a victim.
I’m an actress in pursuit of happiness and finding my truth. Through my writing I am able to release my thinking without being judged or having the need to impress people in this crazy world we’re living in. I hope that through my experience I inspire you to find your truth and version of happiness.