I’m home, safe, comfortable, un-guarded, surrounded by familiarity, in my own bed, my own books, my own aura. I look out of the window and everything I see is old and familiar; I can visualize the inside looking at it from the outside because I’ve been inside plenty of times before. My shoulders are relaxed, my eyes aren’t darting everywhere, I can leave my things unattended, and as I exhale, I can find the words, “home sweet home” scream out of me after the familiar, warm baked cookies scent I inhaled as I stepped into the room I’ve lived for about seven years now.
wow, it’s so good to be home, I never thought I would say this. I mean, I’ve said them before when I go on family vacations and return back but this time it feels like I finally mean them, like I know what I am talking about. How strange, maybe this isn’t how I’m supposed to feel? I’m not sure but here is how it all went down:
On departure day, I was running on four hours of sleep. The day prior, I had a thirteen hour shift at work; I arrived home very late (luckily I had already packed) and knew I was due to be up by 5AM, since, literally, the very night before my shift, I found out I had to be at the bus station an hour prior to my departure due to seating purposes. Can you believe that if I didn’t arrive at least an hour before, they would give my seat away and would leave without me? Even if I arrived 5 minutes before departure time and the bus was full? That is ridiculous!
When I arrived to the bus station, I was guarded and alert from the moment I sat on my chosen seat. I felt very uncomfortable, as if I needed to look over my shoulder the entire ride. I find this to be a good thing after the moment’s passed, I think I was just taking care of myself in someway. Wouldn’t you agree? It’s completely different if you’re with your family and have people who can take care of you. When you’re alone, nobody is going to look after you, you have to look after yourself and your things; so the alertness I had wasn’t so bad. I found myself very aware and nervous about my luggage, which had me paranoid before we left and at our rest-stop; which is a great thing, your making sure nobody is damaging your things or are near it without your authorization.
also On the first night, I couldn’t sleep, everything was super-extra locked, but that night, I just kinda wanted to be in my own bed.
But look! Photo: On our way, we passed near the white-house and though I’m not at all political, I found this to be super cool!
I arrived in the early afternoon, and I was beat by the time I got to the hotel. There wasn’t anything that I wanted to do but lay my head on those pillows and rest (after having an early dinner). Though when I got into an Uber (it’s true what the song says, “Uber-Everywhere), I was wide-eyed, this time not paranoid, but I just wanted to look at everything. Everything is a lot more spread-out, I couldn’t get anywhere without a taxi (which why touring the places I wanted to wasn’t going to work out… I couldn’t afford it). I’m not upset about it though, one day I know i’ll get to travel without worrying about money one day #Ihavefaith.
I was there for work anyway! And I had to be up early for filming.
For privacy purposes and because I don’t like to discuss anything about my work, all I want to say is that everyone was awesome, the experience was great and I had so much fun from beginning to end.
during my break, I got to go out and take a very small walk around the area and I was surprised that there are barely any garbage cans around! I walked for about three blocks. And not only that but I found everything super clean in the streets; it was such a different atmosphere from where I’m from (east coast) to Virginia.
One thing I loved about it was the slower pace. the people weren’t as intense or aggressive. There were A LOT of nicer people that smiled more often, I went to purchase water at a nearby market and the woman had the widest most genuine smile and seemed like she really meant it when she said, “you have a good day.” I loved it! Also, I noticed they say, “you-all” a lot, even if it’s just two people… just something I found hilarious.
Oh! And I found this extremely beautiful park, I had no idea about it but check it out!
Side thought: I’m beginning to believe the east coast is one of the late bloomers of spring.
I worked practically all day, finished in the evening; only had time left to pack and go to bed to wake up at dawn to catch the bus going back home.
It wasn’t as exciting as I thought it would be or had hoped, I am glad for the time spent. It was certainly a learning experience for me. I hope as I do this more often, I learn to relax, I was suspicious about everyone, I didn’t want to talk to anybody or be near anybody, I was a bit paranoid and I certainly felt that I gave the vibe of “back-the-fuck-off” very strongly. I had in my head, “I want my own car” so I wouldn’t have to feel like every stranger is a danger.
Maybe this is a good thing, for now.
I’m an actress in pursuit of happiness and finding my truth. Through my writing I am able to release my thinking without being judged or having the need to impress people in this crazy world we’re living in. I hope that through my experience I inspire you to find your truth and version of happiness.